A full recovery!

at 5 months post op, I have made a full - and I mean FULL - recovery.  I am riding hard every day, wearing out my horses, and the last two nights in a row we were out until late in the night bucking 100lb hay bales to get them stacked and in the barn before the rain comes.  Lifting them was harder on my forearms than my knee... in fact, it never even gave a little.  I forgot I even had a bum knee... well, It isn't bum anymore!

I have to just say, that my dr did the most fantastic job.  When I prayed and asked for a good surgery, I never anticipated my knee could come out of it in pre-injury shape.  But that is just what has happened.  And I thank God for it every day!

4 months post op

I am feeling great!  I can run 30 minutes easy.  I have been having some pain / issues with my tendons, but my physical therapist says its because they are so weak.  I have to rub them down and ice them and then stretch alot to get the pain to go away.  But running feels amazing.  I am able to run the look on 105th now, and I like to go in the mornings.  It reminds me so much of running in Mexico for miles and miles and miles and miles.....

2 months

2 moonths post op, and I am doing fantastic!  Last weekend, I rode a trail ride, and Iwas so sore on my inner thighs!  It hurt so GOOD!  I can do walking lunges to strengthen my hammies, and I can spin on my bike any time Iwant.  It is so excellent!  I can't wait until I can run!  No pain, no swelling.  I feel better and better every day!

Six weeks tomorrow! Out of the woods!

Tomorrow will be six weeks post op.  My knee is doing great!  I am walking around, spinning, going up and down stairs, and yesterday we had our Trail Clinic at the ranch to raise money for the hospital bill. 

Here are the "goods"

•  I can sleep without a brace, with no complication!
• I can go up and donw stairs while in a brace
• I can use the spin bike (30 minutes wears me out!)
• I can do all the necessary barn chores, with no problems
• I can longe my horse and ground drive him
• The numb spot on the front of my knee is getting smaller

Her are the "bads"

• Sometimes when I walk I get a sharp stabbing pain right in the bone where it was drilled through
• I am tired of babying my knee, and my mom (although it is with love) is annoyingly cautious
• I can't run yet
• My quad is very very very small, so I don't have the control yet to go without a brace
• My inner thigh muscles are deteriorating due to the lack of riding.

But all in all, I am doing great.  If anyone is reading this (and I doubt they are) and is going to have the same surgery, IT IS WORTH IT!  I feel better every day!

5 weeks post op!

Yesterday I went down a flight of stairs, and then back up, and her is the catch - WITH NO PAIN!
I am still wearing my very expensive, very large knee brace, but since my swelling s gone, it slides down to my ankles and ges incredibly annoying.  So most of the time at home or at work I take it off.  I religiously wear it outside and at the barn though, I just crank the straps as tight as i can. 
I am spinning about 30 minutes a day, sometimes twice a day, and incorporating mild stretching and ab work.  It is hard to know how far to stretch, i get this weird fear that I might just stretch my ligament right out of the bone.  Yuck.
I also have a piece of string sticking out of the incision site on  knee, and I have no idea what it is and it is weirding me out beyond belief.  I get this feeling of fingernails on a chalkboard every time I think about it.  God, what the heck is it connected to on the other end??  EEW!
All in all, I am doing FABULOUS!  I feel better than I did pre-op.  The doc was right!  Short term pain LONG TERM GAIN! 

One Month Post ACL Recunstruction!

Tomorrow is the one month mile stone!  I am feeling fantastic!  Honestly, I feel better now than ever!  At Physical Therapy, I spun for ten minutes (and that may not seem like a lot, but trust me, its awsome!)  I am now walking great with no pain what so ever.  And, they told me today that in 2 - 4 weeks, I'll be able to ditch this huge nasty $800 brace for a smaller sports brace!  Granted, I stil wont be able to ride my horse, run or do any stairs for a while. (6 months for riding and running.)  But hey, it's fine!  I CAN WALK!  So at least that is some good news :) 

I did however get a bill a few days ago from my insurance company.  Well, not a bill per say, but a letter saying that they arn't paying out.  So now I have to get on top of that one, and find out why the heck they arn't paying.  Stupid insurance.  I mean, seriously!  Why rape me for all I have?  I'm a poor young fresh out of college kid!  Geesh!  Tax return is spent, paycheck is spent... what else can I spend?  I guess I could have a bake sale or something. lol.

3 weeks 5 days post op

Yesterday I got out of bed and felt like a human!  I could walk with my big brace on with no pain.  I walked all day, and still had no pain.  On friday, during my PT, I got the go ahead to spin on a spin bike!  It was amazing!  I spun for 8 minutes at PT, and was already sweating!  Im sooo out of shape.  I have been trying to find an affordable one somehwere, but everyone wants 400 dollars for them USED!  Its rediculous!  So I can't work out at home yet, until I find one.
The incision sites are pink and gross looking.  I can't wait until they dissappear!  I hope that soon they at least turn white.  Pink is just nasty.
Other than that, I feel amazing.  I feel better than I did before surgery.  I feel steady, square, and my shin bone isn't flopping to the inside.  It feels so good to feel steady!
I have flexion to 118 and full extension!  Thank God our bodies heal! 

15 Days post op

Things are getting a little easier, but my god, it still hurts.  Last night, I just couldn't sleep with that stupid brace, so like a damn idiot i took it off.  I slept better, but in the morning my knee was hugely swolen. 
Exercises are getting easier.  The little things we take for granted when it comes to muscle memory.  My quad is just gone.  Apparently, after my first surgery, I never rebuilt the quad correctly, so I have been using the wrong muscles to walk, which would explain my back pain over this last year.
In physical therapy I am frustrated.  I feel like I can do more than what is asked of me, and like a true athlete, I push it every day.  The therapist is telling me to slow down, because the graft in my knee is barely hanging in there.  So I have forced myself to stop trying new things, and have tried to use both crutches like they say I should.
My staples have been out for a while, and the scabs are almost gone too, but I am still not allowed to take a bath or sit in the hot tub.  This is highly inconvenient because it has been super cold lately.  Oh well, at least I can bend my knee to 90 with no pain.  And i can straighten it too.

9 days post op!

I got my staples out yesterday, which honestly hurt like heck.  Stupid stapels.  The day before, I had my first PT appointment.  I got some new exercises with a big ball and some tubing.  Luckily, In one week, I only lost one inch due to atrophy in my quad, and my calf looks healthy.  The swelling is already way down, and I can see my knee cap.  Bruising is also going away.  Today I got the ok to take a real shower, and I even drove myself to work in my mom's automatic tacoma! 
At night, I still have to take the heavy drugs because if I don't, I teak my knee and the pain wakes me up.  I am still using two crutches, but around the house can get by with just one and the brace.  I can now also unlock the brack to sit more comfortable, as long as I can still extend my knee all the way.  (If that becomes hard, I'll have to go back to locking the brace.
6 weeks is the "woods" as they say.  Im not out of the woods yet, 5 more weeks to go.  And then I'll be safe to walk, but not to ride or run.  It is so hard to just sit around and get fat! 
Pain scale is pretty low, unless you count the weird popping my rear right hamstring makes at night.  Excruciating.  Or when the bone hurts.  Feels like a growning pain I used to get when I was little.  Fits of throbbing bone pain all the way to the bottom of my shin bone, and all the way up to my pelvis.  Damn those hurt.  But other than that, 9 days post op is pretty comfortable.  I can't believe i can already bend 90 degrees!
After my first operation, 9 days post op was still hell on crutches!  So I feel pretty good about the whole thing.  Please God, keep my graft safe so I never have to do this again!

three days post op

Its three days post op and I decided to stop taking the Oxycodone.  I am managing the painpretty good with tylenol and advil.  The oxycodone was making me feel so weird, and sounds were so loud.  Even the tap water sounds were super super loud, I could barely stand it.  I had to whisper my own voice was hurting me so badly. 
My knee looks ok, pretty darn swollen.  Also, it looks like someone stapeled up the wrong piece of knee... like they dropped the stapler and it got me in the wrong place or something. But other than that, mobility is an issue.  It is hard to want to get up and do anything.  At night I tend to flex my own muscles andhurt myself.  Things pop and it feels like my muscles are cramped or tearing.  Very weird.  Other than that, I can't wait unitl I can walk again!

Day One Post Op

I got up early yesterday and did my usual barn chorse.  My mom and I got to the surgery center right at 8 o'clock.  I was so nervous I could barely stand it until... I saw someone I knew!  A wonderful woman from the barn where I ride Monday nights was there!  I immediately felt better having seen her.  Once in the pre-op center I changed and got ready to see the anesthesiologist.  Everyone was so nice!  But come time for my IV I got really tense.  I pass out with needles, so I was really nervous!  The nurse told me it wouldn't be that bad.  She priked me with a tiny little needle with some numbing stuff in it, and honestly, I didn't feel a thing! 

Once they took me back to the operating room, I laid down on the table.  I was joking with everyone about how the operating table looked like one of those things they strap guys down onto in death row, and made them promise not to kill me!  haha

They gave me something that made the lights go wiggy and the next thing I new, someone was holding hot chocolate in front of me helping me drink it.  And let me tell you, it tasted GOOD!
Things were slipping in and out of conciousness, and before long I was getting dressed by someone, and then I was shaking and trying to use a walker to get into a wheel chair.  The pain was non-existent, thank God.  I remember getting into the car, and then something about the Walgreens pharmacy and mom begging with them to give me my perscription in 1/2 an hour, not 2 hours.  They did. 

Once home, I went to bed and fell asleep.  A few hours later I moved from my bed to the couch, promptly threw up, fell back asleep and slept til dad got home.  All in all, a pretty painless day. 

Like sand through my fingers...

Got my tax return yesterday, and promptly bought two money orders to pay the surgery center and the doctors.  Dang.  The good thing is, I have my deductible almost paid... only my co-insurance to go, and I have no idea how I'm going to get that money.  Its in God's hands.  I  pray he helps me somehow.

Oh the Bills

Got a bill from the surgery center, already.  I mean, seriously?  I havn't even gone under the kinfe!  Oh well.  The good news is I did my taxes today, and if  I did them right, Im going to be getting over $1300 back!  And its all going to go straight to the surgery center.  Such is life.  Stupid knee.  Will you ever get better?

I found a really good article that I want to share

This article told it how it is... so I liked it.  I am tired of reading the comments and posts about how "wonderful" surgery was.  I mean, yeah I wish I could believe it, but I've had knee surgery before, just not so extensive.  This one was really good... made it seem more real I guess.  From pre-op, to even recognizing how the poor guy had been compensating his bum knee without even knowing it... check it out.

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/398466/what_to_expect_when_a_loved_one_has.html?cat=70

Fitted for my knee brace

Today I ducked out of work and headed to the Cast and brace room at the doctors office.  They fitted me for a post surgery knee brace.  It is big and black and nasty with velcro and buckles like you have on a backback.  There are two little round gadgets at the knee that you can either lock to keep the knee straight, or you can make it so your knee can flex to various degrees.  I got to talking to the woman who was helping me and when I told her about my first surgery, especially the part about how my wooden crutches had no rubber stoppers, and they slipped around, and I had no knee brace, she was shocked! 

Any way, 757 dollars worth of knee brace is in a blood red carry tote in my car ready for March 1st!  I also started collecting change, you know, to pay for it haha.  So far I have $12.87 !!!

This is me in 20 yrs if I don't have surgery!

Check this out... me in 20 years if I don't get my ACL repaired.  This guy had a surgery that failed back in like 1979, and then never got the failed surgery repaired.  I can already feel my bones locking together like that, leaning into the inside... and I don't even have a meniscus like this guy to cushion the blow!  Check out the nasty arthritis!  Thank God I live in the USA where surgery is constantly getting better, and this kind of stuff can be repaired!



I just saw my future :(

My mom took me shopping yesterday, which was awsome.  I was trying to find some really comfy sweat pants, you know, for those two weeks or so when the stitches hurt like a b word and they get stuck on everything and your knee is too swollen for jeans...

We of course got side tracked in the victoria's secret, but then I saw my future.  This poor guy was hobbling around on crutches, with a nasty knee brace on his left knee.  Aw man it looked so painful.  Suckity Suck Suck.  And I looked at my mom and said, "well, there goes me in about a month." 

:(  Sad.

Money Matters

As most of you know, I have an ACL reconstruction surgery scheduled for March 1st.  There are several goods and bads that are going to come with this surgery, but mainly this is the list:
Goods:
1.  I will finally have a stable knee!

Bads:
1.   6 months with no riding.
2.   Terrible Pain
3.   Problems taking care of / training my horse
4.  Money matters

The 6 months no riding will be hard, but duable.  I'll be in too much pain for the first few moonths to even think about it.  The taking care of my horse is manageable... friends and family will come around.  But the money... BIG PROBLEM!  My deductible is $2,000, and then after that I pay 20%, up to a max of $2,000 more.  And that doesn't include physical therapy.  I know, your probably thinking, its only $4000, right?  FOUR THOUSAND DOLLARS!  I'm pretty much freaking out because I owe on my student loans (way more than 4000) and I owe for the tires I had to by a few months back, and now this.  And to top it all off, I still have not gotten a raise.  7 months at the same office, and not even a 10 cent raise.  Cheap company.  Sooo... If anyone knows of a good fund raising idea... let me know!  I'm pretty desperate at this point, and getting ready to clean up the 4Runner to sell it and pay the up front deductible.  :(  sad day.

(As seen on http://www.homegrownheart.blogspot.com/)

Surgery is Scheduled!

Finally got a call from the Scheduler at the Orthopedic Hospital.  My surgery is scheduled for March 1st.  I have  a pre-op appt set for February 23rd in the morning, and Physical Therapy will start 5 days after surgery.  A post op is scheduled for the 9th of March.  Unfortunately, it means I can't participate in the Buckskin Horse show :(  And it also means no summer or spring riding, which is tough to swallow.  Time to get all my riding in now!  So wish me luck!

ACL Reconstruction vs. GI JOE Surgery:

A conversation I had with my brother in regards to my upcoming surgery.  It put a funny light on it, and really took me back to my childhood.  (FYI, Putzer was our childhood terrier, and Sean used to film his action figures using stop action in the back yard.)  ENJOY!

ME: they are gonna drill holes in my bones and thread a tendon to replace my ligament

SEAN:  Just like putting a new rubber-band in a broken GI Joe.  Make sure they get it tight enough or you're leg will be all floppy forever...but not too tight or you won't be able to bend it.

ME: HAHA Im gonna take a GI Joe into my mormon surgeon and tell him just that.

SEAN:Ya. tell him you gotta be able to pull his legs off of his body like between 1 and 1.5 mm. thats the tolerance you want. same for your leg. If we cant pull your leg off like a millimeter or so then it too tight.

ME: omg my coworkers are wondering why im almost pissing myself laughing so hard.

SEAN: Is he gonna have to open your back up with a big screw driver to put the rubber band in?

ME:   HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
i hope he gets a small rubber band, not a big one he has to tripple over to make it the right size
those never work out right

SEAN: They're ok. I never had any problem with them.you just gotta muke sure all three or four loops of rubber get hooked on right. otherwise you gotta go in for follow up sergury and thats when guys have complications. infections, PTSD, dismemberment, Putzer chomps. you know

ME:  hahah I hate it when the heads fall out right at the las frikkin second...

The body snaps shut and "shit... the head is in my lap and im too uncoordinated to put it back in"

SEAN: I hate it when all the marines are waiting in the damn chopper, taking fire from the enemy, after a hard day of dodging fukin fireworks, and the pilot decides "I think I'll break in half the guys won't mind waiting till Dad gets home so he can fix me and I can fly them outta here!" and then by the time you start filming again it 6 pm instead of 2, the sun has moved, the shadows are all wrong, you're to impatient to wait till tomorow, and now your precious stop action ends up on the "strait to DVD" rack.

instead of grossing 3.4 mil on opening day like it should have.  all thanks to one pilot's weak insides.

he didn't have the guts to complete the mission. no inner resilience

ME: HAHA sean seriously, you should be a stand up comic

Im pissing myself!

SEAN: haha. I know right? :) that'd be so fun. I'm hearing this routine as I'm typing it...

Here we go again!

It is terrifying to think that I will be going under the knife again.  Granted, the first operation was in Mexico, with a doctor as old as my great grandfather - Im sure he is not a specialist in groundbreaking procedures.  This time around, I'll be sure to have good crutches, ones with rubber grips that won't slip on the concrete.  I'll have ice!  Oh the magic Freezer!  One thing I did NOT have the first time around!  I'll also have a Physical Therapy regime, and a mom.  Oh yes, a mom!  Being half a world away from mom after a surgery is not a happy place!  So I'll just have to suck it up.  I did this once and I can do it again.  As long as everyone pitches in, and I ask for help, this time around should not be near as bad... should it??